compassion, collaboration & cooperation iN transistion
Lies and Bullshit
me since a teenager, the yin&yang of the universal existence of LIFE [IT]self
Bullshit is different than lies. Lies are things that are totally untrue. Like if you tell me you checked the tire pressure, but you really didn't. Of course, I could say, "That's bullshit! You never checked the tires!" And grammatically I'd be correct. But bullshit can be a really liberating concept when used in a somewhat different way.
Now, I'm going to pick on my Dad here, which is something I never do. I truly owe my Dad my life in many ways, and wherever he is, he knows how very much I love him. And in that same sense, he knows that when I quote him as I'm now going to do, it's not lies and it's not bullshit, but rather a chance to clear up some ancient bullshit that needs cleaning up. At least from my point of view.
OK, I think I was about five, and we were talking about radio. Like how it works and where the sound comes from. And Dad says to me, "There will never be women announcers on the radio." And I asked, "Why not?" And he said, "Because radio catches a certain range of the human voice, and because of that women's voices sound harsh and grating on the radio. They don't sound pleasant, and nobody enjoys listening to them."
I thought about that for a minute, and then I said, "But women sing on the radio all the time. And they sing with women's voices, and those sounds are on the radio, and people like it. So if a woman's singing voice can be on the radio, then why not a woman's talking voice?"
"Talking voices are different than singing voices," he answered. "Women sound fine singing on the radio, but their speaking voices are grating."
"But women talk to little babies all the time," I objected. "And if their voices were so bad, wouldn't they make babies cry? But they don't. Women's voices are good at soothing babies."
"Well soothing babies is one thing, and reading the news or announcing songs is something else. Nobody wants to listen to a woman read the news."
Well, sorry to say, I took his word for it. I stopped critically thinking, and I stopped asking questions, and I just filed it away under, "People don't like to hear women's speaking voices on the radio." But what I had just done was I had swallowed a line of bullshit.
The difference is that my Dad wasn't lying to me. He was sharing his convictions in a true and open manner, but his convictions were simply a collection of biases, baseless judgments and red herrings. It's just that he had managed to convince himself of them (the regrettable situation of believing your own bullshit), and then use them to overwhelm my still tender bullshit detectors.
But now I've finally got my eyes open and I'm watching for bullshit everywhere!
And it's not that I haven't been aware of bullshit, it's just that I never had a name for it
It's too bad that kids often grow up in entire family nets of bullshit and lies.
Access: PublicLeave Your Wise and Insightful Comment
Views: 129
-
Comment by Michael Grove on October 17, 2012 at 16:35
-
"RIGHTEOUSNESS - that almost unquantifiable, chin-out sense of
doing and saying the right thing, is something we could do with -
MORE OF "
-
-
America has the most millionaires, the most billionaires and
it's wealthiest citizens have garnered more of the planet's
riches than any other group in the world. They even have
hedge fund managers who make in one hour as much as
the average US family makes in 21 years!
-
-
The Harvard Business School information session on how to be a
good class participant instructs, “Speak with conviction. Even if you
believe something only 55 percent, say it as if you believe it 100
percent,” Susan Cain reported in her bestselling book Quiet.
At HBS, Cain most succinctly noticed, “If a student talks often and forcefully, then he’s a player; if he doesn’t, he’s on the margins.”
Add a Comment
You need to be a member of Gaia Community to add comments!
About
© 2024 Created by Michael Grove.
Powered by
Maybe we should start a log of bullshit we discover…naw, it would probably take over the world! Thanks for this most excellent post, my dear. Keep the faith!
Wow i don’t think i would have answered my father the way you did at 5… that’s my point too, children are inteligent then we give them credit for… in fact i think Jesus said something about his kingdom to be open to someone who is as innocent like a child, now i think He was the representation of God, so if He says that kiddish behaviour rocks then that’s what we need to be like; kids…..
http://loveishere.gaia.com/blog/2008/2/getting_personal_with_god
I don't just like this post, I LOVE it! I've never thought of it this way, but it rings with truth. I'll never think about bullshit in the same way (or without smiling.)
Yes, it's liberating! Only thing is, how much of my own bullshit have I not identified and actually perpetrate and believe? :)
I am believing your bullshit Martha :) so, is it really?
Of course, you may be believing mine :-D
hugs and dungbeetles,
Sprite
Well speaking from personal experience, the amount of bullshit we all have is directly related to just how much crap we eat on a daily basis….so…I know Im still full of it! :-)
Martha, this is a fantastic post!!! And I love the Microsoft reference of “let us help you help yourself.” I have been fine tuning my “instrument” to be able to detect the slightest hint is BS within any given moment. My Dad was an extremely gifted liar and I was able to reverse engineer most of his stories and mannerisms very quickly. The patterns became very obvious and almost entertaining to decipher. But the problem was energetically, I began to attract more bullshit artist.
The realm of lies and bullshit can get very convoluted. Acknowledging our own lies and bullshit we tell ourselves is priceless. I recently have made a conscious decision to set off a trigger in my system when ever I am perpetuating any old bs. I have to admit it was a bit jarring at first, but it sure keeps you in alignment. Good times.
Awesome story Martha!
Kids are so good at seeing right through the BS. My son is has an amazing bs detector and he often guides us to clear thinking…
:)
Yes Martha, we've grown up in a world full of bullshit. One only has to look to George W to see how far bullshit and lies can take you. We are inundated with so much of it we can't even recognize the truth when it does exist.
This was a great post. Like you said, people actually begin to believe their crap, then they feel justified and righteous teaching it! Thus starts the layering and eventual torment to scrape it back off. Thanks a lot; I've really got to learn to set my radar on high for the BS also.
SC
Wow, Martha. You've made the difference quite clear. And oh my…I am starting to see I am also guilty of this BS business. Lol. Your dad is so cute.
Amy :-)
my brother believed the same thing your dad did …so it really couldn't have been bullshit.
My dad believed it, too, until he had 5 daughters. I think the last one did it :)
Wow! I'm happy to see so many wonderful people here interacting with this! Amazing! Basically, what I hear many of you saying is that, yeah, we benefit from being aware of bullshit, but hearing it in yourself is harder. Maze says well, if my brother believed this, too, then it “couldn't nave been bullshit.” Yep. There's the socially consturcted and collectively believed part, and then there's the personal stuff we tell ourselves. Clarity would be really nice, huh? Isn't that one of the things people are working to create from their spiritual practices? I hope?
Beyourownmedicine, Bill, Sherri and Goddess2day, I'm very happy to meet you! I really enjoy meeting people I haven't met before. Thank you for your thoughts!
Martha, sometimes believing the bullshit is safer (just in case it is true) than not believing it.
I meant to own this :)
believing the bullshit was safer for me than not believing it and it was true
What was true, Sprite? The bullshit turned out to be true, or it was simply that believing it truly was easier?
For example, I brought my car in for new tires and was told the axel was cracked. It may or may not have been. The alternative was breaking down on the freeway. I had it replaced. Sometimes, it's better, more convenient, safer, and saves energy and time to believe (or go along with) the bs.
As for my students, I suspect some of the excuses were bs. I had a student who had three grandmothers die in one semester. Likely, no. Possible, yes. Now I drop two absences for any reason (I truly hate taking roll as these are COLLEGE students but, I also want to keep my job, and, with grade disputes, it's nice to go back and see how many classes they missed.) I happen to believe “mental health days” are just as important a reason to take a day off. The beauty, they don't have to tell me. Saves me from carrying around little notes of paper, death notices, jail summons, etc. For any ongoing issues, I handle on a case by case basis.
Now, there are cases when it is better to investigate the bullshit :) Wish I done that in some of my past relationships, could have saved me a lot of heartache, but I suppose the lessons were important.
Great post Martha, and I have enjoyed all the comments as much as you have. Thanks.
My Dad had an over-active bs detector. Everyone was full of it according to him and he made us wary. He learned to regret it when his 3 daughters became “Philadelphia lawyers” - that's what he called us. We questioned everything. even him, which he didn't like one bit.
I think it is important to have our BS dectors on, but not on “Stun”
This is good. I have 2 comments. I will start with the second, first. One maxim I chanted to my six children was: “Question authority.” They do. And I am proud of them. But they question me, too. Ouch!
First comment: I never though of BS as it is being discussed here. I BS a lot. I know others who BS, too. Just for fun my brother and I would BS one another. Both knew that the other knew what each was doing.
Take a truth, fact, dogma, custom, practice or expectation. Stretch and exaggerate it until the absurdity shows through. Then laugh about it and start all over again.
We are the clowns. The truth seekers and seers. We tell and laugh.
Some even get paid for doing so.
Like cholesterol: There is good BS and bad BS. I just never called the bad “BS”.
The BS being discussed here I call malicious lies, comaflogue, blinds, trickery, scams propogated for personal and corporate gain without any sense of social responsibility.
There is no BSing about it.
Thanks for bringing up the topic, Martha.
Great blog, just great.
Made me think of one of my favourite pieces - Harry Frankfurt's paper On Bullshit, a philosophical investigation of the concept!
Here is the summary from wiki:
“… the liar deliberately makes false claims, the bullshitter is simply uninterested in the truth. Rather, bullshitters aim primarily to impress and persuade their audiences. Whereas the liar needs to know the truth the better to conceal it, the bullshitter, interested solely in advancing his own agenda, has no use for the truth. By virtue of this, Frankfurt claims, “bullshit is a greater enemy of the truth than lies are.” ”
And a video of him on the subject, just in case you want more!
Love,
Sandra
BULLSHIT !!! is one of my favorite expletives :-) Sometimes, though it's a bit fun to see how far I can bs my way just to get reactions. The problem is I start laughing at some point and the whole effort to bs someone falls apart instantly.
Thanks for a great post, Martha
Yes Joyous and Gini, there is a fun kind of bullshit that's like a game. I've played that, too. And I'm sure I will again.
Sandra, I DO like that about that the bullshitter is “simply uninterested in the truth.” And from that perspective, isn't that type of avoidance actually a type of action that is motivated by fear?
Thank you all so much for coming by and reading this post. You're all the greatest! And that's not bullshit! :)
I'm thinking smilingly about a situation where everyone bullshits so nicely, as a part of a culture of bullshit-ism… so that when anybody speaks truth, they are totally confused and defeated! Holy crap! How to respond… sincerely?!
This be the traditional sectors in my country.
Sigh.
The truth shall reign! Believe it.
Back to the fun now. Yes, this was a great exercise. Thanks M. Sherri
What a great blog, Martha. Bullshit - Lies - Bullshit - Lies … BULLSHIT ! And what interest in bullshit and lies that abounds around GAIA. This is good.
Until now bullshit and lies have never been clearer ;-)
Great blog, love it!!!! And yeah, never thought much about the difference between bullshit and lies - to me it was all big bad lies so realizing some is just sad ignorant bullshit might make me softer in my judgements… maybe. And also watching out for it more sounds very good.
Thanks for this blog, Martha!